I talked about self-injuring last week. I wanted to talk about a good book called “Scarred Soul” by Dr Tracy Alderman today. It will give you some tips on how to stop self injurous behaviour if you desire to do so.
Below is a checklist from page 132 from the book to see if you are ready to stop. It is a simple yes or no answer.
1. I have a solid emotional support system of friends, family, and/or professionals that I can use if I feel like hurting myself.
This is very important. You need to talk about it. Stop keeping it a secret. Dr Alderman discusses this in her book. Bring it out of the closet.
2. There are at least two people in my life that I can call if I want to hurt myself.
3. I feel at least somewhat comfortable talking about SIV with three different people.
4. I have a list of at least ten things I can do instead of hurting myself.
These are distracting behaviors such as reading, dancing, walking, talking on the phone, singing, cooking, whatever you like to do.
5. I have a place to go if I need to leave my house so as not to hurt myself.
6. I feel confident that I could get rid of all the things that I might be likely to use to hurt myself (razor blades, cigarette lights).
7. I have told at least two people that I am going to stop hurting myself.
8. I am willing to feel uncomfortable, scared, and frustrated.
9. I feel confident that I can endure thinking about hurting myself without having to actually do so.
10. I want to stop hurting myself.
That is the first step really, in my opinion. You have to want to stop. It is a one day at a time thing. Each time that you make it through an episode without hurting yourself, you get stronger. It is a great feeling.
It takes changing the time and place where you hurt yourself. Normally there is a ritual where you self-injure. Change the routine. Change something. You will have a better chance of success over changing the behavior if you make a change.
By announcing to someone else that you are going to stop SIV, then you make yourself accountable for your behavior. That does something in your mind.
I would suggest reading the book “Scarred Soul” if you desire to stop self-injuring. It is an excellent book. It is not an easy book to read because it makes you look deep inside. But it is something that will offer you help. And that is what you want, isn’t it?
Remember, you can stop, one day at a time. I did. And so have hundreds of others. Life can be good again. It is not always easy, but well worth it.